Decisions, decisions

One of the most difficult challenges of parenthood is the sheer number of decisions you have to make. Suddenly, we, the parents, are completely responsible for making decisions about another life. Up until now, there have been plenty of decisions to be weighed and chosen, but these have mostly been for ourselves. At most they have been 'with' another person or persons. These other people have the freedom to argue and disagree. The responsibility for the result is shared by the persons it may affect. As a parent, we decide FOR our child about so many things. The weight of that responsibility is really hitting home.

The first big one was a name. It is such a big part of the identity. At least this decision is made just once and done.

The next ongoing decision we are facing is childcare. Childcare is much more difficult and complicated than I had imagined. The responsibility for this choice is weighing especially heavily.

Ideally, one of us would stay home with the munchkin, but she is a full time job that doesn't help pay the mortgage. The next best option is another family member, but that's not going to work full-time either. The nanny or home daycare would be the next closest to having her home, but how do you choose a complete stranger to care for your child?

I've never been a paranoid person, but suddenly all these crazy scenarios run through my head for every option we are considering. What if the nanny I interviewed is part of some child abduction ring? What if the home daycare person I'm talking to has stolen her identity and faked all these certifications? What if the people living next to the daycare are child molesters? Crazy, I know, but I can't help it.

We've finally settled on a larger daycare, at least until she can talk and tell us what's going on... There, at least, the people are background checked and certification is more stringent. The facility is large, clean, and there are lots of toys. I think we can manage to work from home to watch her with grand-parental help 2 days a week, at least to start.

...and this is just the beginning!